SNAP-O-RAMA: Put Your Stunna Shades On! (x4)
Posted by Saucy Dame Dizzle on
June 14, 2006
*singing*
Ohh.Tell me when to go… Tell me when to go…
Tell me when to go… Tell me when to go…
Go (dumb), go (dumb), go (dumb), go (dumb), go (dumb), go (dumb), go (dumb), go (dumb)
This weekend me and mi amigo went to the spizot (spot) where shit be CRUNK!
You know, the type of spot where . . .
1/ The ladies hair-doos are fried, dyed and layed to the side - crimped, spritzed, two-toned & whipped.
2/ You can see the fashion logos on mf’rs clothes a mile away . . .on purpose.
3/ Fitted Caps, Braids, Sneakers, Stripped Polos, Gold Teeth & Hennessy are the standard.
4/ No, it is not your imagination - the sweet aroma of ganja is tickling your nose hairs something fierce. Probably cuz the person standing next to you has a half smoked blunt tucked behind their ear, in anticipation of Round 2.
5/ Even though the venue is more packed than Old Country Buffet after church on a Sunday; leaving little room to move freely: you BETTER NOT step on a mf’rs shoe. That’s grounds for an ass whuppin’.
6/ Don’t start no shit, it won’t be no shit! Somebody just might get hauled off in the ambulance.
7/ Is that your girl on the dance floor in the pink thong, twirkin’ it?
8/ If they make it in a size 5X, someone will have it on. . . no matter what the trend. (ie: hot pants, mini-skirts, tube tops, biker shorts, leggings, etc)
9/ Every time you go to the “Ladies Room”, there’s a random broad, talkin’ shit and brushing her weave in the mirror.
10/ The dance floor stays FILLED and people aint too cool to move EVERYTHANG . . . EVERYWHERE! Shake what your momma gave ya!
11/ And just for good measure, there are a few ghetto white girls w/ fingerwaves, cornrows and pierced noses tossed into the crowd. (think Hustle & Flow)
12/ You got the “Rose Man”, the “Picture Man” the “Jello Shots Lady” and “Security” all in your face at the same time - wanting your money or a phone number.
And the beauty of it all is that the cover charge is only $5. Why? Because you’re really just at a large sports bar - that turns into a club juke joint on the weekend.
Yeah . . . one of those type of spots. Even though we live damn near on the border of Canada, I sometimes feel like I’m in Tupelo Mississippi. Straight ‘Country’ !
And how about everyone had their STUNNA SHADES on? Of course, even though I had NO INTENTIONS of being on camera duty - I had to capture the moment (just a taste). So I tried to get as many pics of peeps with their shades on as I could. A handful of people declined. (Caint be having any evidence). I almost started some mess when I unknowingly asked somebodys man for a picture. That’s when I had to call upon Item #6 (as listed above).
Guess what? I may take a notion to go again soon because my country, Canadian border dwelling, Midwest, big-boned, yellow, ghetto ass was having some FUN!
To see more photos from my Saturday night go HERE
9 Responses to “SNAP-O-RAMA: Put Your Stunna Shades On! (x4)”
Girl, there was enough gel, hairspray and oil sheen to have a daggone bonfire in that joint!!!!
You are funny!
By Berry on Jun 14, 2006
Juke Joint is right. This place reminds me of an Ernie Barnes painting, [Yes, that one]The Sugar Shack that we all know and love. Inhibitions go out the window. Dental Floss is in abundance with plenty of brown in between the cheeks. And, common fashion sense is totally disregarded. It’s hot as hell in there [no pun intended].
By The 5th Letter [E] on Jun 14, 2006
Since I’m an old man and trying to keep up with today’s trends, can anyone explain to me why are people wearing “stunna” shades in a dark or dimly-litted club?
And none of them can’t see shit anyways.
Also, I don’t see any pics of you ‘Lique. I know you was stunnin’ hard at the club.
Plus, be careful ‘Lique when you go to these ghetto-fied clubs — I don’t want you to get shot in the ass or get stab by some chickenhead’s press-on nails.
If they make it in a size 5X, someone will have it on . . . no matter what the trend.
Word. And it’s usually a skinny brother wearing a 5X white T-shirt. Now why is he wearing a 5X T-shirt when he knows he’s an XL? Corny mofo.
In fact, all of you corny mofo’s reading this: Stop wearing white tees too big for your body. Know your size! Bitches.
Great pictures ‘Lique.
By Trent on Jun 14, 2006
Yes indeed! Nothing like a Sports Bar that turns into a club/juke joint. Hot, humid, and over-crowded. Where you’re likely to see anything, and where people will likely DO anything. Still, there’s nothing like it is there? I call that a real party b/c often times, when something gets to be to bougie, it gets to be too fake and stiff. Feel me?
Like you said though, if it comes in a 5X, somebody will have it on, even if they weigh 145lbs.
Hey Lique, I got a question. Why do all the stunna shades appear to be white? What is our fasination with those white glasses? Is it b/c they stand out more? Round here, they call em “hater blockas”. Its so amusing to me to see people drunk and high, in a low light setting, with dark ass glasses on, bumping into shyt b/c they can’t see 2 feet in front of them. But you know us, we have to always be fly!
Peace
By Sincere on Jun 14, 2006
“Word. And it’s usually a skinny brother wearing a 5X white T-shirt. Now why is he wearing a 5X T-shirt when he knows he’s an XL? Corny mofo.”
LOL @ Trent! You right about that!
By Angelique on Jun 14, 2006
Yes! I had a ball. It’s usually not my choice of place to kick it. But after the 4 Te-Killyas and the muzak bangin…. a girl was on “10″. It also helped to be kickin it with my 2 favorite home-GIRLZ Tae & Saucy Dame. Boots was killin a sistah but the muzak wouldn’t let my body stop movin!
By Dacia on Jun 14, 2006
When I got to #12, I was like this sho’ll sounds familiar. Funny you should compare it to Tupelo, MS. I went to college in Memphis, TN. So as TI would say, I know all about that. We used to kill Denim & Diamonds — country/western bar by day, but come Sunday night, it was on and poppin. LOL. I didn’t know they did it like that up north. You can take folks out the country, but can’t take the country out the folks, can you?
By summer on Jun 15, 2006
Gabby’s on Saturday night - you gotta love it!! One of my favorite places to go out when I go. REAL People, the fakeness of downtown works my nerves (not to mention $15 to park if you dont want to go to a ramp) and the higher cover and higher drinks. $30 at Gabbys goes a long way!! $30 downtown and I haven’t even had my first drink!!
I love reading your blogs Ms. Saucy Dame D-LUX!!!
By Rae on Jun 16, 2006
GOOD GUGGA MUGGA! And who said ain’t no black folks in Minnesota… This don’t make no damn sense. Its amazing ghetto birds are the only birds that don’t fly South for the winter.
By Lish on Jun 19, 2006